Thursday, November 8, 2007


am i losing my touch?

i used to be THE GIRL to go to for advice. boys, friends, family, relationships, school, get the point. if anyone needed advice of any kind, i was the girl they came to. lately, people havent been asking me much. maybe this is because i dont live with my friends, and dont make enough time for my friends (which i really need to work on, before they become ex-friends). or if they do ask for advice, its about reading guys and whatnot, and for some reason i just cant seem to put forth any inspiring words of wisdom. its like now that im in a relationship, i forget everything that leads up to that point. how to tell if a guy is interested, if you should ask him out, etc. lately when people tell me their boy troubles though i just kind of sit there and nod. then they go "so what would you do?" and then i sit there some more, and try to think of something, and my mind is blank. then i say something lame or uninspiring and the person is like "ummm ok.. whatever."

i mean i know boys can be lame sometimes, or hard to read or whatever, but what am i supposed to say to people? "Yeah, boys are dumb." like thats believable. no one feels any empathy from that statement just because they all know i already have the comfort of being in a steady relationship. therefore, all my views on the stupidity of the male sex dont matter. well thats just great. so yeah, i cant even comfort people about their problems because the whole time they are thinking "..what a load of crap.."

its like when girls get a boyfriend everyone just thinks theyve had this perfect life history with guys. hmm, lets go through some jess history...just to get my point on why this is complete bs.

1. i never had a boyfriend until i was 18 (see #2). i dont even think i went on any dates in high school.
2. i came to byu as a freshman, met a 23 year old, and started dating. i broke it off after a couple weeks, and 3 months later i find out hes getting married.
3. i went to usm (university of southern maine), dated a coke-dealing, pot-smoking, self involved skater boy who was manipulative in every way.
4. went back to byu, some guy i had known for 3 or 4 years found me on facebook and we started talking a lot. he told me he thought i was "the one" [freaky, i know.. i was like umm going to pretend you never said that], and then he called me drunk on my 19th birthday.

there are some other interesting stories, but for the sake of not talking about ex's and making people uncomfortable, i will stop.

so honestly i cant tell if it is my advice that sucks, or peoples perspectives of me now, or if i just cant get interested enough to give people logical answers.. i really do think i have lost my touch. now what will i do with myself? giving advice to other people doesnt make me feel helpful/insightful/fulfilling anymore. im going to have to start picking up some new hobbies or something!

to end on a happy note, although my past dating history has been full of jerks and interesting stories, it has now reached a new level.

a happy one.


Juji said...

and I'm only slightly abusive so things are looking up. :)

The Blairs said...

I don't know. Josh can hit pretty hard. Sometimes he hits me right in my arm muscle and it makes me want to cry.

Eric, Halcyon, Viana and Brooke said...

Do you still feel confident in your fashion giving advice? If so, big sunglasses and huge loop earrings--hot or not?

yours truly said...

joshua is slightly abusive but we all now im stronger. so that is all set.

and, big sunglasses can be hot. loop earrings? no. that reminds me of middle school. but to each his own, right?

Juji said...

The bigger the hoop, the bigger the hooch!